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Sacred by Design
We’re diving deep into topics like desire, sexual integrity, relational healing, and so much more. Get ready for honest, safe conversations with women, about women. Together let's do the important work of connecting your sexual struggle to your story to God. Your sexuality is, in fact, Sacred by Design
Sacred by Design
Left Foot, Right Foot, Breathe - Discovering Betrayal
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What happens when the world you trusted comes crashing down with betrayal?
Join us on Sacred by Design as we welcome back Anne, a dedicated voice in the realm of betrayal trauma recovery. Together, we unpack the whirlwind of emotions that accompany the discovery of infidelity and shine a light on the path to healing. Anne shares some essential steps for reclaiming one's identity and emotional well-being. From the importance of a safe, supportive environment to practical recovery steps like sharing your story and engaging in self-care, Anne opens up a roadmap for finding strength and solace.
With compassion we explore the power of taking things one step at a time, through the simplicity of "right foot, left foot, breathe" to navigate life's storms. We also introduce exciting opportunities for deeper connection through upcoming webinars and group sessions.
Contact us today: If you have a question, comment, or need help, email us at info@regenerationministries.org
Free Resources for you!
👉Women 21-Day Prayer Journal & Devotional - (Women overcoming unwanted sexual Behavior)
👉Compass 21-Day Prayer Journal & Devotional - (Wives who are or have been impacted by partner betrayal)
Navigating Betrayal Trauma Recovery Roadmap
Speaker 1Welcome back to Sacred by Design. Welcome back, anne. Hey, andrea, I'm so glad that you're here. You are such an advocate for voice for women who are suffering through betrayal trauma. So this conversation is to give voice to some of the many emotions, questions, complexities and, right off the bat, we should probably say that we can't cover it all.
Speaker 2Yes, yeah, we're just going to put our big toe in today.
Speaker 1Yes, yes, yes. So where do you want to begin?
Speaker 2I think I want to begin with we're here. We are here for women that have just discovered that their husband or boyfriend has been looking at porn or has been interacting with women on Facebook or Instagram, and they're in shock, they're questioning, they don't know what to do, and we're here. We are here for them and we want to help create a little bit of safety for them.
Speaker 1And Regeneration Ministries is a special place to land.
Speaker 2It is yeah.
Speaker 1We do things a little differently, don't we?
Speaker 2We do. We care for the whole person, the whole identity being personhood of a woman and, in particular, the trauma around a sexual betrayal and what it brings and what it all the impact, the confusion, the anxiety, the body responses, the doubt, the fear, the questioning God, we unpack it all and we're comfortable with unpacking all of it.
Speaker 1Yeah, so holistically. One of my favorite things that I have had the privilege of doing with you, beside you, is breath, prayer or even just a body scan, and that is something that is so impactful and helpful in this process.
Speaker 2It is helpful in my own life too, and because so many emotions come up right away fear, worry, questions, anger, what I'm, what just happened to me? Right, the body scan offers a settled space to say slow down, get back into my body, out of my head and into where is it impacting me? My heart, my soul, my shoulders, my head. A body scan just helps slow everything down and tune in, tune in to how hard this is.
Speaker 2So, as we're giving voice to women, part of that voice involves vocabulary, and you've just listed so many symptoms of betrayal trauma and I know that we've said that before, but it needs to be said again that it is traumatic, the betrayal- it is traumatic and I love my um sisters in this field, um dr barbara steffens and others like her who have researched um the impact of learning of a sexual secret life from their loved one, their sacred partner, and the research she has done has just expanded the help for women, because so many women feel like they're crazy, it's their fault, I'm over-exaggerating, but the education that it's brought has transformed the field. It really has since 2007, 2008. And we are grateful for their voices and work.
Speaker 1Yeah, what are you finding? What are you finding these days with with women coming trying to heal?
Speaker 2That they need a roadmap it's so dysregulating, you know and a roadmap that they're hungry for. They're hungry for education. They want to understand their trauma responses. They want to learn about boundaries where they don't even know they need boundaries. And that's where we start. That's in our webinars, in our groups, in our coaching. We kind of begin with safety and worth and sanity and stability. That's where we start. We start with those things, just kind of like the basics, and it sounds simple, but it's not Okay Because I was just going to say so, if somebody's listening right now and that resonates.
Speaker 1I need a roadmap. That's what I need. What is step one, Figuratively, literally speaking, what is step one in the roadmap? The roadmap would be sharing your story.
Speaker 2Sharing it with a trusted person, right? Oh, sharing it with a trusted person, right, mm-hmm? Having somebody ask you questions, what was it like in the early discovery Mm-hmm? What did your body feel? What happened day one of discovery Mm-hmm? Sharing the story, having an empathetic listener, starting to feel safe with one other person after sharing your story? And self-care practices. Okay, like we go over self-care how to make, why self-care? What are some practices? The basics, basically water, food, sleep, mm-hmm, care, love, tlc I talk about almost in every one of my first coaching calls I say tender, loving care. That's all you need this week. Are you sleeping, are you eating, are you talking with a friend? And that's step one. Really, that's doable. It is doable, especially when everything feels so chaotic, yeah, and so topsy-turvy and so like the earthquake, right, right. So we have to slow it down. Like you brought up body scans, the body, the emotions, the basics, and then what is? What's the impact? What's the impact been like for you?
Speaker 1TLC sounds so doable. Those are small, really basic, really important steps. So that's step one. You also do group work, yeah, and the benefit of that is I imagine A sisterhood right.
Speaker 2First, you feel alone. You get a little safety with maybe some coaching or talking to a few trusted friends. You get courage to maybe join a group and that's our hope. Right, we call group work like the secret sauce. Every week, each woman says I'm not alone and I was heard. Today, and that's what I hope also from our time today is being able to introduce our webinar and our groups coming up and what a sisterhood offers you don't feel isolated, you don't feel alone, you don't feel so different and so scared and it's a safe, safe, confidential landing place.
Speaker 1Safety is so key. It's a safe, safe, confidential landing place. Safety's so key. It's so key, so let's not skip over the webinar. Yeah, let's talk about that just for a second, because I think that that is something we should land on.
Finding Beauty in Life's Challenges
Speaker 2Yeah. Tell us about it. It's going to be October 10th and it'll be an hour and you'll hear tools on education educating you about sex addiction, educating about betrayal trauma, introducing boundaries, introducing self-care, a place to ask questions and hear testimony. And it's an hour and you can come and you can ask a question, or you can come and just listen and, you know, kind of hear more information than you heard today and it'll lead to a discovery, a six week discovery group that we're gonna hold, oh there's, there are more steps more steps.
Speaker 2There's some momentum that you're building.
Speaker 1Yep that that's so special, so good.
Speaker 2I like just talking about steps. It's almost like right foot, left foot breathe. Right foot, left foot breathe, that's it for the early discovery time.
Speaker 1I hope that our listeners feel as cared for as I do right now. I don't feel rushed, I don't feel overwhelmed. This all feels right foot, left foot, breathe, very well paced. Is there anything else we should? Is there anything else we can cover this time?
Speaker 2Oh, I just want you know if your girlfriend sent you this podcast or you found it online. I just want you to know you're not alone and we care about you and we care about the devastation that you're experiencing and we are a landing place like that. God is a rock, God is a refuge, and there's others who are going to encircle you, Amen, Amen, Amen. Encircle you, Amen, Amen. And I want to leave all of us with this quote. That is powerful and I want to share it with each person listening. In the middle of the pain you didn't cause, the change you didn't want or the reality you didn't know was coming, your life can still be beautiful.
Speaker 1Right foot, left foot breathe. Thank you, anne.
Speaker 2Yeah, please come to the webinar.
Speaker 1October 10th Check us out, yeah.
Speaker 2Thanks, Andrea. Yeah, it's awesome.
